European Cruise Travelog
August 7, 2022 by Jan Martin Borgersen
Impressions of Italy
July 14, 2022
It’s California, but older, and with better shoes.
Venice is big mall. With boats. And pigeons.
Europeans smoke a lot.
F1: Maybe we’ll see the Marinara Trench. That’s Italian.
Impressions Pulling into Port in Croatia
July 16, 2022
| Me: | It really does look like California here. |
| F1: | It’s one gender reveal party away from catastrophe. |
Quotes From Our Tour Guide in Dubrovnic
July 16, 2022
Water in Croatia is potable. It is not like in the US or Brazil, you can drink it.
Pile means main gate. Actually in our language it means chicken.
It’s a very safe town. Except this time of year people come specifically to rob people from cruise ships. But mostly it’s a very safe town.
| Man: | When do people here dine? |
| Tour guide: | about 75 years. |
| Tour guide: | oh you mean dinner? Maybe 8 o’clock. |
In Croatia we like eat and drink. You know this grappe drink? It 40, 50 percent alcohol. Two drinks you drunk. We drink that before dinner. Sometimes we drink it again after dinner.
We are going back to the ship but first we will stop here if anyone wants to buy souvenir. We have to do this because it’s law.
Impressions from Croatia and Corfu
July 17, 2022
Dubrovnik is smaller than Kings Landing, but it is very pretty.
Everyone hates Napoleon.
There really is an Irish pub everywhere.
The crickets sound like someone put katydids inside vuvuzelas.
Impressions from Santorini
July 18, 2022
Santorini is mostly not like Hawaii.
I like Santorini wine.
We didn’t just buy F1 a belt. We bought an experience in a local Greek leather shop.
I also like Santorini beer.
Best. Kabob. Ever.
F1: This is the first time I won’t be able to eat Mom’s leftover baklava.
We didn’t get to ride the donkeys up the steps.
Impressions from Athens
July 19, 2022
Lots of columns.
Lots of Giannis jerseys too.
The keyboard-saxophone band at the lunch cafe was good, but they were no Yanni.
Impressions from Mykonos
July 20, 2022
Mykonos was very windy today.
The architecture is like Tatooine, but white and blue. I think it is aligned with the light side.
A Day at Sea
July 21, 2022
I walked six laps around the jogging track on the ship and averaged a 3 1/2 minute mile.
Sailing from Split
We hopped off the ship to touch this dude’s toe.
Lots of ferries in Split.
So long Greece and Croatia, we hardly knew you, but you were wonderful.
I would come back and stay longer. Trouble is deciding where. Split? Mykonos? Santorini?
